Prologue: Our beer world tour continues. Today we hope off the Fokker friendship in Belgium, That’s right it’s ‘I can’t believe it’s not France’. Home of the waffle, the ‘French’ fry and of course Herge’s adventures de Tintin. Tintin achieves the near impossible, he is a redhead and likeable. Therefore to test that theory that Belgium redheads are the only good redheads I have selected a beer entitled Satan Red, that’s right SATAN Red, fuck I’m hardcore..
Appearance: Like the Yarra River. Murky, dirty and may contain carp.
Taste: Oaky and dense. Not for chicks. No carbonation – but good with a strong aftertaste.
Packaging: Devilishly handsome. Neon-esque quality that says tits and tassles, or hints of red headed burlesque performers.
Drinking Location Suggestion: In a cellar, in Germany, with a guy called Hans, who has just suggested an S&M session with his 120kg wife Frida, and her sister Gretel. If you had two more of these you might even consider it.
In a word: Hellagood.
Possible Slogans: “Help me baby Jesus”.
Ranking: I’ll have a pint thanks