Prologue: Kozol had the most difficult task of all of the beers tasted, the morning after beer. That’s right I decided that this Czech master (which we dubbed Ivan Lendl) would cure my hangover, but alas this was a task that could not be performed by even the best beer, and this thing was not the best beer.
Appearance: This had the look of whisky.
Taste: It was tangy, bitter and all in all disappointing
Packaging: It has annoying gold foil around the top of it, this is our pet hate on beer bottles, it;s give the feel of Gold Coast property developer, a shit bloke that is dressed up with some tacky gold frills. It also had a very untrustworthy looking alpaca with horns. However on the plus side it contains the word Velkapopovicky which is Czech for ‘Trust me this is an amazing beer’
Drinking Location Suggestion: on a hill with a goat
Food suggestion: Sausages and mashed potatos
Possible Slogans: “Like a Slutty Blonde on Brownlow Night.’ some gold trimming gold, no substance, but will good down anyway.
Ranking: Nah mate, just a Butchers
Postscript: About a year later I had this beer again. This time it was not drunk in a Castle, but rather on a mountain in Prague. It might have been that it was fresh, it might have been that I was drinking it out of a giant stein, or it might simply have been that I was not hungover, but I assure you it was a lot better then that it was ‘the morning after.’
Post Postscript: Fast forward another 8 months or so and I move into a house that shares a driveway with the Czech club. Just like every country pub has a VB sign out the front, every Czech social club has a Kozel sign – so every day I see that untrustworthy alpaca