The naming of beers is a difficult matter, it isn’t just one of your holiday games. Nope hang on a sec, that’s the naming of cats not beers. Beers really can’t be that hard to name. Either you fall into the Brewery /Style name pattern. i.e. Carlton Draught, Mountain Goat Steam Ale, Holgate Pilsener, or you go the really long, slightly obscure route. The Moondog Henry Ford’s Girthsome Fjord, Moondog Cock-sockin’, Ball Knockin’ Chipotle Stout or Moon Dog Perverse Sexual amalgam. Do you see how cool and crazy those guys are?
There is of course another, little used approach. I’m going to call it the superlative approach (some might call in the Adam Hills joke approach). This is where you give the beer the descriptor you would like the drinker to say after taking their first sip.
Today we review two beers that fall into this category. One that lives up to it and one that doesn’t.
First up is the Epic Armageddon IPA and this is a truly Epic beer. It’s pretty much everything you want an IPA to be. Firstly its ABV is 6.66% which is just cool. It looks amazing, with a copper golden colour and a nice head. The hops feel New Zealandy (that’s a thing now) with great tropical fruit tones; floral and a little grapey. The flavour is amazing. The hops are balanced with the malt backbone and there is interesting flavour all through the sip and aftertaste.
It’s pleasant, non-aggressive and very, very enjoyable. I enjoyed it with Jordan on our balcony on a hot summer evening and it was very well suited to this. It went very nicely with a casual pizza and this is what this beer can do; it’s casual, approachable, relaxed and yet exciting, flavoursome and supremely interesting all at the same time.
An Epic and Jug worthy beer.
The setting for the second beer was similar; it was hot, it was late afternoon and I found myself at Section 8, everyone’s favourite pop-up, hipster, packing crate container bar. There is something very Melbourne about Section 8. It’s grungy and hidden, although only in a way that they used to hide things five years ago, the hiding of cool bars has reached all new levels since then. Now you can regularly hear people say ‘I went to this bar last night, it doesn’t have a name, but you go down this alley way, past some bins, around a corner, go through the green door, then down some stairs, through a curtain, around another corner, past a row of sewing machines and then push on a metal door that you have to lift slightly before pushing it though.’
In fact I’m convinced that Section 8 can’t be cool anymore because it’s a bit old now, and
more importantly I was drinking there, and I am in no way cool and/or funky.
The important bit here though is that I had a beer and it was a ridiculously named Super Bock which is not a bock at all, but rather a lager all the way from Portugal. It is not Super either. But I guess, Okay Lager doesn’t have the same ring as Super Bock. It’s not the worst beer out there, but hey it’s not the best either, it has a little more malt than your typical euro lager, and it’s this malt that drives the smell. There is no real hop character to speak of and it is really a standard run of the mill beer that clearly only gets imported so that the uneducated hipsters think they are drinking a premium euro brew. I would suggest the hipsters drinking long necks of Cooper’s Green were getting a much better deal though. Schooner
Long Bow You Tube Clip: And here is the Adam Hills joke that I’ve just stolen, I’d be concerned that he’d sue me, but he doesn’t have a leg to stand on. Bang. See what I did there? Cause he only has one leg (well one and a half).